Some of you may know I have my first book that's getting ready to release soon.  My fiance and I have been working so hard at creating and publishing a new children's book series, Brudders' Books.   What a learning process it's been.  Yes, there is so much to celebrate and be grateful for, but I've had many unforeseen setbacks and challenges along the way. 

We're so close, we're almost at the finish line.  But to be honest, it's scaring me. 

I've been going through a lot of anxiety lately, being consumed with fearful thoughts of what-if this, or what-if that.

I've suffered with anxiety a lot in my life, always fearful of not being good enough or letting someone else down.  And while my to-do list in these final few weeks before my book launch is growing and growing, I'm feeling more and more paralyzed with anxiety and fear. 

So I prayed about it this morning.  Really hard.  I had nothing left to do.  I was stuck in this anxiety whirlwind that even I knew didn't make much sense.  Well, as it turns out, about 30 minutes after praying in complete desperation, I read something that couldn't have been any clearer of a response.  It immediately snapped me out of it.

I wanted to post this because something deep down in my heart told me there's someone else on here that needs to read this, just as much as I needed it. Here’s what I read:

"Listen to Me, you who know righteousness, You people in whose heart is My law:  Do not fear the reproach of men, nor be afraid of their insults.  For the moth will eat them up like a garment, and the worm will eat them like wool.  But My righteousness will be forever, and My salvation from generation to generation…I, even I am He who comforts you.  Who are you that you should be afraid of a man who will die?...And you forget the Lord your Maker who stretched out the Heavens and laid the foundations of the earth.  You have feared continually every day because of the fury of the oppressor when he has prepared to destroy.  And where is the fury of the oppressor?...I am the Lord your God, who divided the sea whose waves roared.  And I have put My words in your mouth, I have covered you with the shadow of my hand, You are my people." (Isaiah 51)

How I interpreted the above:

Wowsers!  I mean the Lord makes a pretty darn good point.  All of these fears and worries I have built up inside of me…who and what am I really fearing?  Someone else's opinion?  My book's success rate?  The publishing process?  I could go on.  But the point is, all of these are just superficial things created by man.  So basically, I'm sitting here fearing what man thinks of me.  Yes, I'll admit, that's very accurate.  That's exactly what I'm fearing.

But to God's point above, that is just nonsense.  Man is just man.  He or she is no better or worse than you or me.  Man's power doesn't even come close to God's power.  Why?  Because God created man.  And He created all of us equally, so none of us are more or less capable or better than the other.  The only one we should be fearing is Him, as our Creator, since CLEARLY He is way more powerful than all of us. 

So for me, to hold these anxieties and fears of someone else's opinion, of the process, it's pointless. I told myself to just stop.  It won't do me any good or any better.  And so I snapped out of it and proceeded with a new confidence.

Will I falter?  Yeah, probably.  But I've got the above message saved on my phone as a good reminder of where my head and heart need to be. Talk about a prayer answered.

Happy Sunday ya'll,

Kristin